Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize