It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
