walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
