Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
