how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
