if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
