well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
