...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
