brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
