Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
