Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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