I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
He uses pillows to masturbate.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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