She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
