Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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