As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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