So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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