just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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