I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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