i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
They took my balls.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
pray to the hookup gods
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
