I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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