oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize