4 words: hood of his car
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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