She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
