That's intense
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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