My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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