If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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