When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
