Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I have feelings that need drinking.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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