How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
