Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I will pee on everything he values.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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