Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
