this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
