If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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