What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
