you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
