my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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