nut hugger
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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