4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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