i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
