You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Randomize
