In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
