well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
