Buhtt sex?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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