So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Operation Purity has been aborted
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
