We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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