also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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