Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
