I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
