I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I just pynch a tree in the face
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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