Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Are we still banned from the library?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
