Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize