At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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